i just noticed 4 flies in my red wine. i drank them.
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
You were demanding water from a bottle but I didn't have one..so I just took the water bottle from the hamster cage. You're welcome.
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
I let him fuck me in a batman costume. Don't talk to me about needing to read fifty shades gray.
They need to leave so I can start drinking shamefully.
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
So we were in bed when his brother walks in, walks over to me, fist bumps me and says he just wanted to say hi, then leaves...so random lmao
Got home and told boyfriend what happened. He was like "you made out with a guy you call Balls Deep?" and hi-fived me.
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
Facebook just reminded me of the time I found two IHop cheese sticks in my hand bag. Those were the days.
Just looked at my bank statement. 9 out of 10 transactions on the first page were from 9 different bars. The 10th was for birth control pills at the pharmacy. I need to rethink my lifestyle.
We can use the Mac n cheese as the potatoes in our breakfast burritos. Problem solved.
Omg worst high ever. I'm watching Parks and Rec, and all i can think about is how andy, leslie, and tom are my closest friends. Forever alone.
Randomize
