whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
is it sad that i think every plant i pass on the highway looks like a plant from farmville?
He had a huge mole on his dick. Genetics has cockblocked him for life.
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
Shoot me. Guy hitting on me with a beaver on his head. Says it is his spirit animal.
I'm puking to John Mayor, save me. Or at least change it to somethong beyyt
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
This football player keeps talking about his drunk dad. I think he may start crying. Does this deserve a roll tide?
yup and then I snapped out of it and realized I was playing beer pong against a 4 year old... and losing
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
Pretty sure this ice cream truck is following me.
Just to clarify, i'm coming over for tacos not a threesome
I tried to face swap with Chuck Norris. His face was too powerful... it broke my snap chat.
Come over.
Look lady I can't have sex with you EVERY day. I have things to do.
You threw him in the dryer?
He went in of his own accord. Mumbled something about experiencing the blossoming of popcorn.
Randomize
