Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
i love that he's uncircumcised. it makes handjobs so much easier. it's the lazy susan of penises.
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
can you explain how you are here for one night and now my kitchen table is in 11 pieces..
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
Just signed my boyfriend up on a dating website so I could officially have a reason to leave him for my hot neighbor.
You lured him into the bathroom with a trail of jello shots, then proceeded to barricade the door with duct tape. You really should have thought that one through..
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
I just passed a kid trying to leave on a lawn mower
In honor of today being Sunday I am day drinking and watching Grey's Anatomy all day. ALL DAY.
We had sex and then I offered him a cookie...while he was still inside of me. Basically he's in love
You shouldn't play strip poker when you're having a wet fart kind of day.
I dunno what to tell you sport. Short of having a shock collar on, you're gonna wanna hook up with people.
I’m going to fail his daughter so she stays in my class and I can keep fucking him. BEST. ORGASMS. EVER.
Then you can teach the kid to be a home wrecker
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