Crown is evil. It plays hide and seek with my morals
he was wearing sponge bob boxers. Guess how long he lasted.
he asked me to marry him on one of those scrolling message belt buckels.... what now?
So how was awkward coffee with forgets-your-name?
I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
its great to know that you distinguish your relationships on whether you can cum on someone's face
How long does it take to cook a corndog over a candle?
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
You're wearing pigtails and giving away our kitchen appliances. Clearly, you're drunk.
How proud should I be that I googled "dildo with wheels" and actually got the result I wanted?
Hey I'm trying to get back with my ex I'mm done doing whatever we were doing I hope things workout for you
Weird flex but ok.
Randomize
