did you get engaged???
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
If Amber from Teen Mom can get a new boyfriend, so can I.
I'm sorry. I really don't see what's wrong with pregaming before a wine tasting.This champagne won't drink itself.
The wine tasting is just for charity anyways...
all I wanna do is swim in an Olympic sized pool of Gatorade and tylenol.
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
Apparently "I have the beer shits" isn't the excuse my boss wanted to hear. So sue me
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
We were making out and truffle butter was playing in the background. I stopped mid make out session and said, "I'm really sorry but I have to rap Nicki's part."
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell
I had a threesome last night with my fiance' and our soon to be best man. Everyone is surprisingly chill about it this morning. Is this any indication of what the wedding night will be like?
....I just did my boss
I love you. And I will hold your hand as we skip on the road to hell.
Randomize
