That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
handjob tips. give me some.
There's limited edition cherry vanilla nyquil. It's like they know how much I hate myself and they're giving me a consolation prize.
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
Yeah someone just put a trash bag that says "use protection" on the snow penis
I'm lonelier than Tom Hanks in Cast Away, right meow. Ready to make this bong my Wilson.
Just so were clear I meant the head your face is on
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
No, the moral of my Oxford interview was "Never snort caffeine pills".
I tried to find an emoji but none convey my excitement for receiving good sex soon
Nothing like waking up and having two guys who aren't your boyfriend talk to you about their hard dicks before 9 am.
Never in my life have I seen a grown ass man get on all fours and attempt to buttfuck himself with the leg of a chair. I love Vegas!
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
I’ve got a closet full of cosplay outfits and horny boytoy to help me ride out this pandemic
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
