Jon and Kate. Drink everytime we see tears. Drink twice if a child cries. Finish your bev if you cry.
What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
iPhone photo doodle is awesome. I gave my vagina some lazers and sent it to him. He has a whole series waiting on his phone for when he gets off the plane.
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
I just ate powdered extacy out of my wallet. I think I might have for a second of my reasonable life been on your level.
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
OH GOD NOT SANTA BABY. NO NO NO. YOU'RE LIKE 85. OMG MULTIPLE WOMEN. NO NO NO STAHP.
I didn't know where we were going to start fucking, so I just strategically hid condoms all over the house before he came over.
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
We went the strip club and out of no where the waitress brings him over a quesadilla and a jäger bomb and says your usual!! He swore he had never been there before
I just licked a piece of cheese off my phone screen if that makes you feel any better
I know it's wrong but I'm human. Now get over here, tie me up, feed me pizza and Fuck the crazy out of me. Please.
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST.
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
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