Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
maybe it wasnt such a good idea to pregame our lease signing...
well what she called a "work function" most people call "doing shots with your boss while people throw napkins at you."
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
I feel like all of the victims from Seven. Best birthday weekend ever.
And the funny thing is when I went to the kitchen this morning, all 4 pizzas were still there in their boxes, untouched. My question to you is: what were we eating last night?
Like there's an 87% chance I'll end up on the bedroom floor demanding sex while freestyling in your face. I'm going to buy rum.
Once you've seen a girl stick a snake in her snatch normal stuff seems like Barney and friends
If I don't have tequila in my hand soon, I'm going to have to violate human rights laws
For the record, rock bottom is where you start crying during porn because your ex used to slap your ass like that.. Continue on with your day now.
She broke up with me after I spent the whole day speaking in nothing but Marshawn Lynch quotes.
I bet you there is porn for people who get off on someone rubbing Chipotle on themselves
I'm making a will, in it I'm leaving you my skull.
There is blood all over my sheets and no discernible source.
Randomize
