Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
I kept grabbing at Stephanie's boobs because I thought the leopard spots on her dress were popcorn.
he asked you how you felt and you yelled "I FEEL SO PROACTIVE!" and started coloring with sharpies
I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
So some sort of safe sex group just flash mobbed the bar by putting condoms over people's beers.
They left screaming as a hale of lubbed up condoms rained into their hair.
i didnt have any regrets until i found out he was a freshman.... and the only reason he got into yale was because of soccer... and he wasnt premed.
I put on slutty clothes under my normal clothes, im like fucking super slutwoman
Best superhero ever to exist
No apologies necessary. Just give me sex and Pop Tarts, and we'll call it even.
if i don't get grease into my system pronto i will undoubtedly die
It's finals week and I'm halfway done with this bag of wine and don't plan on stopping. Say goodbye to my GPA
The amount of dicks I have seen in the last hour is more than I have seen in my whole life.
I should stop using "Braveheart would do it" as a basis for decision making...
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
Yeah. Of all the things to be cock blocked by a plague is the most unexpected.
Randomize
