WHY DOES GOD HATE MY DICK
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
Riding on an electric horse at the grocery store... dunno how that conversation went but I hope you picked up a 12 pack.
Even though we had just had to physically take her off of someones lawn she was peeing on when they came outside, she still insisted on walking unassisted the rest of the way home. It was dignity meets shit show.
...i'd have to set their sheets on fire.
How many of my tattoos need to be visible for an outfit to be considered "see-through"?
No if my life depended on you fingering me just let me die
Mark just took 50mg Viagra. Tonight should be interesting for the neighbors.
I think I died last night.
Yeah, you got carried home
I'm not drunk because I think my blood just is alcohol from last night so being drunk is sober. If that makes sense
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
What, I can't laugh at my sister being driven crazy by Facebook randomly assigning chat significance to the guy she lost her virginity to?
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
All I'm wearing right now is a condom and a sock.
Just one?
Yup. One sock.
I’ve had a lot of vodka, 3 different dicks and no food since last night. Come get me
Randomize
