Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
You suck. You're fired. I need to find a less reasonable voice-of-reason.
You both must have been completely wasted because every once in a while we would hear you both stop and start singing to each other. At one point it was taylor swift.
She nearly killed the mood when she said "Don't cum on my spray tan"
I traded the garbage men the rest of my handle for a ride home. Best. Walk. Of. Shame. Ever.
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
I just audibly asked myself if i wanted to masturbate.
And then audibly agreed
I have poison ivy on my dick
WHAT
I just want to sing to him and rub baby oil on his head
You came in last night, ate an entire avocado in silence, and then told me I should never accept rides from strangers. Not sure I even want to know what happened to you last night!
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
Found my paycheck. It was in the freezer
Stand and applaud for me. I have successfully masturbated in a Walmart changing room with the door wide open during normal business hours. I lead a very Charmed Life.
Randomize