put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
Came home and the girl was sitting on the steps "talking" on her ipod touch AND was halfway done eating a raw cucumber.
In hindsight maybe we should have moved his homework instead of playing quarters on top of it.
im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
i slept with her, drove her to her sisters house to babysit, and then drove around the block where i met her sister and had sex with her in my van. I'm family Friendly!
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
Youll thank me when youre dead an dont have a cat eating your face
Jesus Christ I am the crazy cat lady of vibrators
Hungover, threw up in a cosmetic case in my car this morning. This is real life.
And then she said "welcome homeeeee!!!" As she got off. Best thing about being back from Afghanistan
On a scale from 1-10 how wrong is it to request "I Hit It First" at my ex's wedding reception?
Definite 12.2 but worth it.
About to wash down a xan with an iced pumpkin spiced latte from starbs and I feel like I've never lived up to my stereotype so much at one time
He licked me while I ate pretzels and chips. I was really living my best life.
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