Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
Aaaaand I just watched him face plant in front of the taxi. This is why we don't invite him to margarita night.
it was all good until he screamed "for fraaannnceee" on his last thrust
We could have casual sex if you want. But I can't offer a bromance to a woman.
Hey, I'm making progress. I haven't thrown up in a bar while wearing a sweater vest in almost two months.
You poured your drink on him and called him a "useless cocksucker" because he wouldn't give you a ride home... on his skateboard
I take pride in being a married 31 year old who sleeps on her best friend's bathroom floor from time to time.
Lesbians had sex in my bed last night. It's a thing of pride
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
I thought I was bad, the girl next to me on the bench was feeding a bush a hamburger and introduced me. Only at lollapalooza.
Do not try to steal a picnic table from a park, all you will end up with are sore arms and broken dreams.
I don't even remember what dignity looks like anymore. I JUST WANTED TO ROAST SOME POTATOES
death, taxes, and me drunk texting you are 3 certainties in life
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
Randomize
