Raise your hand if you bought 2 annoying girls shots of water. CLOWNS.
tried unsuccessfully for 10 minutes to do bong hits while wearing glow in the dark vampire fangs before realizing air was getting out of the sides of my mouth
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
Like that girl needs to get her shit together. For her vagina's sake.
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
I've decided I'm peeing in a solo cup then throwing it on his windshield. It's official. He called the cops 4 times in our first week at the house. He deserves it, right?
I like to balance the number of cups of coffee to bong rips in the morning before work.
I am the kind of drunk to where i can still drive a golf cart
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
YOU ARE TAKING ADVANTAGE OF MY INEBRIATED STATE
YOU ARE DRUNK AND USED AND SPELLED THE WORD "INEBRIATED" CORRECTLY. I AM TAKING ADVANTAGE OF NOTHING.
I CAN'T HELP THAT I'M MULTITALENTED YA FUCKER
I've been smoking weed using candles all week and I just found a lighter. This may truly be the happiest moment of my life. It's embarrassing how excited I got
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
Goal: finish my bio assignment before the Xanax kicks in.
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
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