I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
You only like me because I'm a challenge
You already blew me
how are you gonna miss the world cup? other than the olympics it's our last way to assert our dominance over China after this economic bull shit
Reason #1 for no sex outdoors: Mosquito bites. Awkward, awkward mosquito bites.
No one wears that much makeup to work unless they are trying to fuck their boss, NO ONE
There are parrots here and they're headbanging to the music. There's also a clown and a pit bull that can jump onto tables. Too high for this shit.
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
do you think a sharp knife would stab through a cheese suit?
Everyone is drunk but me. Fantastic. Everyone is hooking up but me. Awkward.
I had a pitcher of margaritas. Now I'm in a laundry room being a 5th wheel and crying. I made myself a bed out of a pool floatie. I win.
He was sucking my nipples then stopped, looked me dead in the eyes and said "im gonna cum for my babygirl"
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
Also day 6: dick is healed and ready to go back to work.
Got lost on the way to my dealer again. He stayed on the phone with me untill i found him and then hooked it up because I got lost.. What a genuine person.
Woke up at 5am in an elevator... Pretty much tells you how my weekend went.
Randomize
