All of his creepy stalker friends want you too
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
I don't know what's more pathetic, the fact that you dated him or the fact that it took a Taylor Swift song for you to break up with him.
I just spent a chunk of my Christmas money on Plan B. I don't think that's what my relatives had mind when they said "spend it wisely", but hey, it was a good investment considering the bad life choices i made last night.
Well if I am having twins, at least I'll finally have 2 kids by the same father.
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
I fell asleep on the bus and woke up in Italian Las Vegas. Europe was a successful continent for me.
I saw a groundgog last night outside my back door. I now have a new wedding gift idea.
I'm drunk, laying in bed, eating macaroni salad. I dropped a piece and tried to pick it up with a fork. My cleavage is bleeding and I haven't been laid yet. Heeeyyyy!!!
I'll miss you, too. On the bright side, a night away from one another might give me a chance to recup seminal fluids.
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
THEY HAVE BEEN GOING AT IT FOR 2 HOURS AND I HEAR THEM BANGING THIS IS BULLSHIT
He nailed that bed down really well so it won't break again. All I could think while he was nailing it was "challenge accepted".
He's petting your head, we need to leave now.
Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first
Randomize
