bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
I should just tell him this. He doesn't need to be all nice and ask me on dates and to do gay stuff like hangout during the day. I'll still sleep with him regardless.
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
then he compared my vagina to a dishwasher. A DISHWASHER?!
When you gave the girl your number the fat girl was like "take mine....here please take mine"
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
He was hiding behind my bedroom door. at noon. Wearing a t shirt. And a condom. Not attractive.
Oh, I never thought you were a dick. You were one of the best morally comprised ideas I've ever had.
i looked down and was like "oh shit thats blood" then it was like "shit, thats not my blood." then it was like whos blood is this??
You decided it was too difficult to walk down the stairs so you just rolled across his kitchen floor laughing like a maniac and trying to drink at the same time
I'm full of champagne and rage, of course I'm showing up at his house.
Far too many of our conversations end in us talking about sperm
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
Dude, the worst part is I can't even pretend it didn't happen because she posted a video of it on Facebook.
Just letting you know that your little sister is now your eskimo brother. You can send a thank you edible arrangement to Tammy.
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