so that wasnt chicken after all
I can't lisssten to Lou Holtzsss ssspeak anymore
Just sold this kid "Magic Furry Apples". He is way to high to figure out they are just peaches.
At least he's a nutritious stoner...
I can hear my liver begging me not to go out tonight
a kid puked on the floor and instead of, you know, cleaning it they cut a square out of the carpet with a boxcutter and threw it outside
I just had a threesome in the back of my mom's van. I'm pretty sure the rest of my week is going to be epic.
Where are you?! I require drunk, males and possibly crying. Vomiting is optional and/or optimal as is karaoke.
how do you play pong handcuffed?
i saw way too much penis for that to have been a funeral
I woke up covered in thousand island dressing. I need answers.
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
Fun fact: nipples work on touch screens. Tell your friends :)
Go shave, and then go fuck the man
YOU ARE SO CRUDE, I LOVE YOU
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