i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
Dude, you need to talk to your mom
wtf?
She just called and asked if i would be part of the intervention she's planning for you
i threw up in over 4 different places last night. it was like a world tour
I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
yah i'm on my way- is everything ok?
i'm holding a walmart bag of my own hot vomit that i closed up with some random chicks hair tie. we r pretty fucking far from ok
i blame lastnights decisions on friday the 13th
who do i root for if I want Christiano Ronaldo to win the world cup on a team by himself and then bang chicks on the pitch?
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
I mean it was like cry my eyes out or masturbate in my moms bathroom.
I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
I knew I'd like her from the moment she supported me messing around with my co-worker on my lunch break
I used the line "you don't have enough pillows". Then left. Thought you should know.
NO ITS THAT IM A SEXUAL DEVIANT AND CANT FILTER MYSELF
I had sex with two guys in one day. One on my grandma's couch, one on a golf course. This is the greatest post-surgery accomplishment I could ask for.
Randomize
