Plus she can make a mean sandwich! That's all I really need. Well that and foot jobs...
The only thing worse than cracking my rib on a slip and slide was having the doctors laugh when they found out in my medical history that I did this exact same thing last summer.
he said 'i love fucking you, ashley'. it was the most romantic thing he's said during sex because he actually used my name.
His hands were made for my vagina.
He was going down on me and raised up for a minute, slipped and punched me in the face. My lady boner left immediately.
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
Promise me you won't have sex in my room
I can't promise you that, but I promise you that I'll try
Might want to in your tub tho. That thing is fucking huge.
i need to stop establishing animals as safe words. Giraffe and Penguin are really awkward words to say during sex
Whatever. I'll take my new fine ass dick sucking nails elsewhere.
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
I swear to god my spidey sense only tingles when someone’s about to die or you’re being a hoe.
Babe if there was a way to give a back rub and head at the same time that's what I would ask for my birthday, Christmas and of course right now. Please think about how and get back to me.
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
They don't really make a "hey I'm fucking your ex wife" card do they ?
Randomize
