you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
Lady GaGa only went backwards in convincing me she's not a man at the VMAs.
Weddings at vineyards should never be allowed to happen. I'm pretty sure I drank every bottle they produced in 2008.
My last google search was "mavis beacon techs tping" Thank god google auto corrects bc otherwise i wouldn't know that i drunk-type 13 words a minute.
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
masturbating while the coffee brews is the new power nap
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
Can you send me the video of that girl that got arrested last night? I'm gonna try and hit that and I need something to break the ice with.
Blacked out last night, but left myself a note that said "oops on oops on oops" that can never be a positive
At dinner her sister yelled "he fucked me AND mom!! Up your standards hoe!!" Safe to say I ruined that family
just got permission to expense a nerf gun
I just saw a girl drinking wine and walking her dog in footie pajamas and a mad hatter hat. First day of the new year and I think I'm in love.
I feel like you should put up a missed connections ad for this..
Yeah I know my dick is weird, but I've surprisingly had a lot of fun with it.
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
Randomize
