Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
i'm all for saving the environment, but when we get into the shower to fuck, he shouldn't flip his shower hourglass timer
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
So I just learned that my father was teaching me rules for drinking games when I was 5.
Did you just say he wants to put a baby inside me?
A girl at the bar is wearing green body paint instead of a shirt. Where are you?!
You should kill a bro for me and drag his carcass home so I can study him.
Hey dude this is some next level no homo shit but im gonna get 2 tickets to the opera and go Hail Mary on this one girl. U take the extra ticket if i fail.
Just had sex to Jesse & the Rippers. Can check that one off the bucket list.
I just folded my boss's lingerie. I need a drink and a raise
I'm wandering around outside asking things if they are god
Is there anything more American than getting day drunk and watching Hulk Hogan promos?
I may or may not be drinking in a church parking lot.
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
Consume your own penis you ugly freak.
Randomize
