North Korea, Best Korea!
she makes me feel like im THAT guy in the taylor swift song
Michael Bay is the white Tyler Perry.
k so who do I think I'm kidding applying to culinary school? I just fucked up a microwaveable pizza
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
Please tell me how you drunkenly remembered your social security number when we were checking you into the ER.
She just referred to her vagina as "this bitch".
I vaguely remember telling a bum she was worth more than this
Theres a high probability there will be two hot men waiting on you in your bed when you get home for lunch.
I was told my cock was a religious experience.
Crappy Mother's Day to you! Those of us who don't have children fill the void with hot sex, sleeping in, more sex, leisurely suntanning, foreign travel, overseas sex, paying cash for sports cars, watching TV, having sex on the floor in front of TV porn, lounging around the house, or whatever the hell we want.
Question: what's the protocol for seeing your mistress walking alongside her clueless boyfriend? If you could answer this ten minutes ago, that'd be great.
I wish I knew the extent of my injuries before I climbed over the fence. Might have avoided the need to purchase a cupholder for my wheelchair.
i cant believe the cop was fine with you saying no we are in a hurry when he asked to search your car
the universe is starting to freak me out.. ive now had sex with 3 people who were born on the same day..
Randomize
