Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
Do you remember giving me altiods and wishing me good luck on the walk home?
the only consolation to the fact that i puked in public today was that i did it down a storm drain... so at least i am a responsible public puker
Get dressed, I have 50$ and you need a new beer pong table since we threw yours off the 8th floor last night.
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
I like how he had to correct himself in stating that I was the fat one in the threesome.
Aaaaand then she sang MDMA to the tune of the YMCA song, with appropriate gestures.
THIS IS A FLATMATE WARNING! The white powder next to sink is washing powder I spilled and is not meant for human comsumption. I repeat- do not digest, snort or smoke the white powder next to the sink!!!!
There was just a girl standing next to me on the train, wasted, wearing only one shoe. I so wanted to pat her on the shoulder and say "oh honey, we've all been there"
Hungover playing piano at a baptism I am the PICTURE of class I feel like I should be struck by lightning
Guy just walked in with a 40 and a Honda steering wheel. Where the fuck am I?
Little does she know that you've out-sourced your conscience to a girl who doesn't even wear pants on a regular basis
Listen, yo... we need to have a serious conversation about this Dollar Store toilet paper. Because if I’m going to finger someone’s ass, it’s not going to be my own.
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