Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
Feels weird sitting between two guys who've had their heads between my legs in a 24 hour span.
It's official. Hawaii is 100% better when you're stoned.
We're pretty much just dating until one of our ex's wants us back
Dude, he's legal now. You could not pry me from his dick with the jaws of life.
I can only use one eye at a time. And if I want to listen, I have to close both of them.
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
I am on top of a rooftop peeing on your freedom
Just bought weed from the ice cream man. The kid in front of me got a tootie fruitie.
man my uterus needs to drop the egg or GTFO, BUUUSHIT
I guess there's no delicate way to say "I'm 90% sure I sucked his dick in the bathroom of the bar."
I'm at that point in my life where keeping an extra pair of underwear in my purse is normal.
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
You're the best thing in my life, followed closely by cannabis and trashy romance novels
I wish there was a tumbleweed emoji. Because that would describe my vagina.
Randomize
