i get turned down more than a collar. where are the desperate bitches i need to crawl to them
We had sex on the first date...do you think he thinks I'm a whore?
Yes and so do I
you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
There's a skateboard on the patio and all the chips are gone. The note on the fridge says 'don't buy cheese'. Stop letting her go outside.
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
So apparently blacked out me judges a man based on what type of dinosaur he would be...
I'm just gonna yell "SURPRISE ME" and see what happens. No way this could go wrong
When you get home...find me in the shower. Only safe place at the moment.
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
if i do community service solely to impress a guy, everyone wins, right?
except your soul
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
HE WILL NEVER BE ONE OF US. HE WILL NEVER BE A DECENT, GOD-FEARING WHORE.
Now I have to go back and sober fuck him. For science.
She tied me to the bed and did lines off my chest before sex. I’m going to put that on my bucket list just so I can cross it off
I refuse to shit my pants for anyone except Cher and Christina Aguilera!
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