When you only buy popcorn and condoms at the grocery store they know whats up.
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
i knew she was desperate at the point in which she started showing me her naked pics on her phone
the sad thing is, im pretty sure she was serious about giving me head for my falafel
Like that girl needs to get her shit together. For her vagina's sake.
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
Fucking her was like skydiving commando in a flightsuit made of kittens
How do I go about messaging a girl on a dating site whose little sister I've had a three some with...?
Got home to the hotel 3hrs ago per texts sent not in english to not a full phone number
You literally chaperoned my booty call.
Dude. She was wearing nothing but Wonder Woman panties and a flag for a cape and sneaking around leaving PBR's by passed out people for the morning. She called herself the 'Merica Fairy.
Why haven't you proposed already?
I feel like I put a fire out with my hand but idk if that was a dream or not
If the smell of things stopped me from putting things in my mouth. I wouldn't be popular with Grindr guys.
Never in my life have I seen a grown ass man get on all fours and attempt to buttfuck himself with the leg of a chair. I love Vegas!
I miss painting strippers for Christmas. Holidays not the same without glitter and body paint
I'll be your substitute stripper tonight.
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