And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
fine. I googled it. you have to eat 5 to die so apparently I'm in the clear.
I take that as "no I'm not driving you to the bar in a blizzard"
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
My coke dealer 411'd my work number just to see how I was doing and gave me his new number. He must miss my business
If you value my life, if you value your own, please look for that godforsaken cookie. Please.
I'm having mini little movies in my head. Like for example. You were talking to a blue whale with jazz man sunglasses, but not the ray charles jazz sunglass. More like sunglasses that are round. Anyway, he has a baguette and stupid french hat. And you , you had your harry potter glasses.
At the end of the date, he asked if he could kiss me. I really wanted to say "dude, I didn't shave for nothing"
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
And now you understand the importance of Saturday naps.
Because you stay up all night having sex and eating sushi?
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
Is someone on their way here yet? I'm way too tweaked to be here alone
My last one night stand called me today. Apparently I gave him a yeast infection in his mouth. Not sure how I should feel about this.
Oh the sweet dreamless sleep of drugs
You? On what? Why?
Randomize
