I am at a bar watching a rat tail get braided.
hahaha our party bus just died on the freeway and we're drinking in the center divider. i'm on the roof. i win
first off, his name is dougie. strike one.
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
After she came with my hands around her neck, she sat there for a minute and gave me the scuba diving sign for a-ok.
Hurry up. Some creepy guy with a "God is vengeful" flyer is asking where I wanna go most today. I think he's going to chop me into pieces.
i think dick pics are a sign of a sexual renaissance
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
I cant see straight, her clothes are all over my floor and I'm covered in bite marks... No I will not go to brunch with you
Holy shit, I wanna ride him into the horizon.
I had forgotten what new underwear feels like. It's as if angels descended from heaven for the sole purpose of supporting my junk.
We just broke up and deleting his dick pics is the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
I have mystery bruises on my right knee, right arm, under my chin, and on my forehead. What the fuck happened last night??
Randomize
