I just peed or puked all or around my parjibgb lot.
parking. I am not drunk
No, I can't hang out with Dave because he already has a girlfriend. The one with the tatoos of cherries on her "cherry." Yeah, she doesn't really make me feel spectacularly comfortable.
I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
Tonight has been like a good ass fucking high school movie
new years resolution: more sex, less car punching, more chipotle.
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
Awww, you two will make beautiful abortions together...
I was so high I told him we should rub faces and pretend to be wombats. He was surprisingly enthusiastic about it.
thanks for piggy backing me around for the rest of the night when I got too drunk to stand.
Still slightly drunk, sitting in Hyde park village. Two small children are dancing and singing "call me maybe" on the fountain in front of me. Am I hallucinating?
It was like, once I started flashing you, I couldn't stop.
You know how I know last night was a good night? Because I remember high fiving a couple WHILE they were having sex.
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
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