We've finally become those guys who you'd see in middle school when you went to the park who are just stoned out of their minds sitting on the swings.
I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
The best time of year to be high is WHEN THE KING CAKES ARE HALF OFF BECAUSE MARDI GRAS IS OVER YEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
I still have your handprint on my ass. You're not allowed to ignore me yet.
I think she just stepped in a piece of mac and cheese, picked it off the bottom of her foot and ate it.
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
I think I'm drunk. That wine was old. I found it behind the water heater next to the mouse poison.
I can't feel my brain.
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
you owe me at least a beer for the services my girlfriend just provided for you
That awful moment when there is no more beer and you find yourself considering tequila and aloe juice.
I'm currently sitting at your kitchen table eating chicken nuggets that I dug out of the trash and thinking about how much I need to get laid.
He cut off part of his middle finger playing the knife game while singing The Knife Game Song at the top of his lungs. He also scream like a girl when his finger hit the floor and he realized he fucked up.
Randomize
