I accidentally burped into my bong.
Did you know that cab drivers don't take quarters for payment? They don't even like it when you ask.
someone shit in a solo cup and left it at the base of the stairs. fuck orlando dude.
LSD in a sugar cube. Dropped it in my whiskey sour and felt like I was rowing a boat.
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
I started blowing him in North Dakota, and I finished the job in Minnesota. Oh, the places road head can take you.
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
I think I ripped my underwear last night doing drunk squats
My coworker's brand new computer showed up today. He's on vacation for the next week. Brian and I are installing Windows 98 on it.
Sorry, that was mean and I didn't mean it. I'm just mad at condoms
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
I'm like the kinda excited when David After Dentist stands up in his seat, screams, and collapses
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
I am going as Rudolph for the Christmas Eve furry orgie.
Is Santa taking the sleigh of slutty reindeer around the neighborhood again this year.
Yes. Several neighbors have requested it.
Randomize
