so my mom just told me that she wouldnt pick me up and take us to taco bell at 3AM...
mark tries to be a total badass to make up for the fact that he's a poor man's pete wentz
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
these girls were driving down the road screaming "SHOT!!" out the windows and pelting potatoes at passerby.
i got hit in the ear.
Dude Eric's high and buying everyone taquitos. How much room do we have in the freezer?
The moment you ate chicken nuggets out of your purse you were my hero.
Where the hell did i get chicken nuggets from
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
Code 10 We gotta leave. Now. I took a dump in the upstairs toilet and its clogged and overflowing, and believe me I don't want to have to explain myself to this frat on parents weekend.
Naked. naked and bneed help.
I'm not breaking up with him because his husky is having puppies.
I know I joke about running from my problems a lot but I'm 3 miles off-campus and need a ride
She was all for the threesome til I showed her a pic of my boyfriend. I think I should re-evaluate my life decisions.
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
now whenever i pass that house all i can think about is how i pooped in their yard..
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