He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
Showed up 2 hours late and still drunk nobody gave me a high five. This intership is bullshit.
What started as a "classy" double date ended with Jeremy and I tripping our balls off and talking to the refrigerator while the girls cried on the couch and questioned where their lives were heading.
So a list of things I should stay away from bringing up at dinner with your fiance tonight?
1) you and I went to a strip club 2) i saw you topless at said strip club 3) i cried when we watched the Real World
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
What made this night legendary was getting pulled over for looking suspicious while wearing an iron man mask
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
I woke wondering who the hell was in my bed. Then i felt boobs and remembered Haha. Thirsty Thursday killed my liver and my homosexuality
"Yeah because the first thing I think of when I hear the word college is tear gas."
so i woke up at six am and his bathroom was flooded. i think i fucked shit up in my sleep.
I mean, I already hooked up with her boyfriend. The least I can do is accept her facebook friend request.
Lmao a dude who just got out of prison said im worth 10 cigarettes in prison...I think that's a compliment
So learned a new trick last night.... Taking body shots from my own tits... Mom would be so proud
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
Randomize
