they made me velveta mac and cheese and fish. I wanna stay here the rest of my life
Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
just saw an advertisement for the rock in the tooth fairy...can you say rock bottom?
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
Friday was tragic. I was naked on top of him and he didn't have a condom. Oh and he had an Obama poster on the wall in front of his bed so our president was staring down at me while I was naked. I felt sorta bad.
You should've just screamed yes we can!
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
I decided staying home, watching porn and masterbating was a much better choice than the gym. And I was right.
Everyone was trying to get you to do a keg stand but you refused & instead declared you could do it yourself, crouched on the keg in your 6 inch heels, leaned over, and gave yourself one.
I rather not break my neck. It's hard to look sexy with a neck cast.
The fact I have to evaluate my choice between tequila and fruity pebbles is a clear image of my life right now
The bump on my forehead, i think, was from falling asleep at front door, on my knees, slumped over. But we played good music so what?
He was gunna drive a half hour for a makeout sesh. Time to take the diapers off and learn about the wonders of the penis, dude
Invitations to sext will not be acknowledged until 10 a.m. EST. Thank you for your cooperation. We apologize for any inconvenience.
I really need to stop having sex.. I haven't been able to get a brush through the back of my hair for a good week and a half
Hot fire fighters installing my closet. Don't know how to go about this. Gonna nonchalantly take my shirt off and see what happens..
Randomize
