yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
Told a girl i wanted to feel her bellybutton from the inside... I need to learn how to flirt
I've never been so happy to start my period. I'm gonna let everyone in the store see me buying tampons.
My TA just asked me why I was late to class. How do I say because I was having the best orgasm of my life in Arabic?
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
That girl that gave me a blowjob, I think I fired her last year.
I mean I drunk but not enough to handle a Scientology convention
I give him a gold star every time I orgasm. His room looks like he's freaking King Midas.
Met Dan at the park for lunch and the guy parked next to us was getting a BJ the entire time. Way to make me feel like an inadequate girlfriend, random park skank. All Dan got was a double cheeseburger and a large iced tea...
You ninja crawled over five sleeping guys to get in my room at 6 in the morning to wake me up for sex
...and I think that may just be my favorite moment in our fuckbuddyship
i refuse to give everyone the satisfaction of seeing the results of my acting on my thoughts
I felt kinda awkward walking into his house in nothing but lingerie and my dead grandmas overcoat
I thought accidentally shaving off my fingertip while trying to shave my butthole was going to be the most unexpected part of my day, but no
You know you have a good math teacher when we're talkIng about mixture problems and no one gets it until he explains it by talking about mixing alcohol
I'm so stoned. We're making Josh's sister bake us brownies. She's so small and pixie like. Her brownies make me cry tears of happy.
Randomize
