I have demons in me.
after last night, i judge her for not breaking up with me
and my loofah got caught on my nipple ring in the shower today. what an awful experience.
You told me you were allowed to keep eating butter because it had just passed midnight and you were on the next day's daily fat servings
I've discovered that regular handcuff keys, sadly, do not work on real police handcuffs.
Then she said I give the best mouth hugs and bar went silent.
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
Mid stroke she told me she'd had bigger. Replied I could tell. Sex ended right at that moment.
I sent dad a photo of my graduation certificate from drug therapy class. It was his birthday so it seemed appropriate.
If the fate of the world hinged on some chubby girl getting laid, the president would dispatch me with a fifth of Jameson immediately and then rest easy.
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
i walked into her house and she introduced me to her family. i dont think she understands the term booty call
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
When they said they were gonna tattoo each other's gamer tags on their asses, I knew I no longer had a boyfriend.
Fuck the system, do you have any medieval weapons?
Randomize