Lets go to the mall and pick up some fat chicks and take them out tonight so we can be the skinny friends
I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
All I need in life is some dick and a big mac.
Just scrubbed my teeth for a good twenty minutes. Herpes is afraid of toothpaste, right?
wow, you never really realize how many muscles you have in your crotch until you pull them all.
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
That's the fall semester you first snorted drugs off my ass I think
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
This stupid maranara sauce stain sucks. It keeps distracting me and it looks like I'm staring at my tits.
i fell out of the car and didnt spill my drink. come overrrr
truly a win in your book
He literally took a shit in my bathroom and then broke up with me.
Dude I'm so clean right now. Like I feel insulted that I can pass a piss test.
you know what? fuck you, fuck your nana, and ESPECIALLY FUCK THE BLACKHAWKS.
OMG LOOK AT THAT PIECE OF MAN
I haven’t trained for this.
Randomize
