whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
I want to dip my vagina in sugar. Not only will it be sweet, but it will have a nice sparkle.
You were so drunk you tried to sell your salsa to everyone on the restaurant.
You said I was the most beatiful preggers youve ever seen...im not pregnant
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
When i tried to give you something that wasn't tequila...like water....you kept saying it was against your religion.
I've always been the spiritual type.
All I can think about is getting a lawsuit and chocolate
I cannot start working out. If I start to look better, I'll ruin ugly women's chances forever. So, really...I'm doing them a favor...think about it.
Please stop letting me make out with hot lesbians.
Definitely not. I may be your best friend, but first and foremost I am a guy. Please continue.
They live across the street from a school baseball field so they have porter potties across the street and let's just say that I'm grateful they exist
He fed me jello shota while i was sitting on the toilet and then he peed in the shower
My roommate randomally bought me two bags of pretzels. Worst "Sorry you can hear me fucking my boyfriend everynight" gift ever.
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
I think my life is a one-way ticket to blackout city.
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