He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
Hate the very realistic pregnancy dreams. Like my dream when I birthed the pirate ships. SO REAL...
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
Would it be out of line to take a picture of all the earrings, rings, hairclips, and other miscellaneous girl items that I found under my bed and post it on facebook and tag all the girls that I slept with this year so they can claim their shit and get it out of my house?
Then she said I give the best mouth hugs and bar went silent.
At 27 it's no longer called 'slutty', it's called having a healthy sex life...
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
I just Miyagied my roommate through her first set of tit pics. Her fuck buddy owes me.
WHY IS THE HAIRSPRAY SOUNDTRACK PLAYING IN THE LIQUOR STORE
Tomorrow we start training our livers for St.Patrick's day. May God be with us.
Why does my car smell like burnt toast?
I take it you don't remember trying to make grilled cheese with your cigarette lighter...
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
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