Phosphoglyceraldehydration... why the fuck is this a word
This is the prime rib incident all over again
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
I've gotta stop getting kicked out of bars for fighting with people over the accuracy of the Harry Potter movie.
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
Hold on. At Sephora trying to decide what despair smells like.
I have a cracked rib, no way in hell I'm bottoming for him tonight!
You slid down the wall and got into the fetal position. He was definitely judging... I was judging....
I think I will always strangely appreciate as well as kick ass at stoned dishes. Like for the rest of my life. Thank you slave job at Starbucks.
you don't even have a vagina so you don't get to tell me what to put in mine
Im going to hell I gave him a handjob on the plane next, to an old guy playing video games on his iPad, on good friday.
I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
I didn't even mind that he came early I just wanted to get eaten out and cuddle
I remember reading the word "lift" so I did. The alarn went off, and I thought to myself "what dumbass pulls the fucking fire alarm?" and then I realized it was me...
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