yo i have your phone
... oh so you probably won't get this message
I can tuck mytits in my pants
I'm in love with you.
huh?
Don't be nervous. I'm just saying - if you had a dick, I'd suck it.
Those balls look pretty dangerous.
Either these are mashed potatoes in my pants, or I was drunker than I thought.
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
there's a girl in the coffee shop just eating a pint of ben & jerry's
SMART GIRL
By the way, I got bored last night and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
I don't know what he did to me, but he did it wrong. I think my pelvis is broken. I cant even drive without it hurting. What. The. Fuck.
I'm 99.9% sure the people upstairs are using walki-talkies to talk to each other across the room. Too high for this shit
Well watching will be involved...it'll just most likely be of me licking your penis instead of me trying to understand how Hans Solo goes up against the Galactic Empire...
just woke up on a lounge chair wearing a durag and holding burrito wrappers in my hands
You gave your one night stand my number. I told him you left for your sex change an hour ago.
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
We already gave up cheese, how are we supposed to give up coke?
Randomize
