You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
my head looks like a cockatoo
mine looks like a lions mane...looks like the entire zoo is going to prom
I woke up this morning to the buzzer on my oven going off... I cooked fish sticks at 425 degrees for 5 hours last night. my house smells awesome
stayed up until 6am doing my presentation on buddhist art and the practice of chanting. took shots. did drugs. the powerpoint now includes a sesame street style game (with chicken/puppy clip art), an xzibit music video (and quotes about section eight and eating steaks), and a reference to a german metal band (universe). this is going to be the best presentation ever
We were sexting and at the end, instead of us having sex, he decided to put "we fell asleep in each others arms."
There was an audience eating triscuts and bananas in the bathroom while watching him puke. It was a good birthday.
I had to sleep with my math professor to pass algebra. Apparently my blowjobs are only C+ quality
it was pretty much a given that i would lose my thong on dollar tequilla shot night
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
i know it looks like there's pee in the mayo jar in the fridge but i promise it's just apple juice that wouldn't fit in the jug after i added the booze.
I blame her lesbian super powers of coercion.
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