Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
there's no toilet paper. I'm using wheat bread.
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
Bruises. Everywhere. Table sex is dangerous
the girl next to me at the bar JUST looked down at her vagina and said "im going to get you fed". if i come home alone tonight...i give you permission to cut off my penis
and then the entire party sang the national anthem a capella around the keg.
Although, to be fair, I am both willing and going to lick marshmallow fluff off of your dick.
Woke up this morning on my doorstep in a basket with a branch, a lipstick lightning bolt on my head and a sign that said "the boy who lived." i love you guys.
it's not that I hate people, I just want to rip most of their faces off.
Def over. He sent me a nude selfie but cropped it right above his junk. Total Silence of the Fucking lambs looking.
My boss brought her husband's telescope to work, so all of us that work in the MMJ Dispensary got high and had an impromptu Blood Moon viewing party. I love my job.
don't worry, i'm not mad. i'm just angry. and furious. and about to set your ass on fire.
did you just describe your masturbation session as "rad af??"
He fucked me over, so I'm going to do what any rational woman does. I'm going to get really high and have sex with his brother.
Randomize
