I'm so drunk I cant read cursive anymore.
Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
And don't be too jealous. Drinking alone watching a chick flick and masturbating isn't nearly as glamorous as it sounds
some guy just asked me if water gets in a vag when girls take a bath. WTF. it's not a wind tunnel!
Fuck. That. I'm gonna get drunker and make them regret they EVER put me at the kids table. I'm a MAN.
My near death experience also doubled as my coming out story
they all just nodded
you sat in the middle of your kitchen floor feeding your dog blueberries one by one
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
my vagina can't take this anxiety. there is no way he is 19 and this smooth. he's lying about his age or he's a goddamn sexual prodigy
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
World Cup Drinking Game: Take a shot every time they call a foul for something we don't understand. Gotta risk it to get the biscuit.
I asked her if she could eat some Doritos so when we made out it would taste awesome
I love that there are toys on the counter. Coffee, tea, wine bottles, gag ball, and handcuffs.
My kitchen gets me.
He licked the buffalo sauce off my fingers and then we had the best sex of my life.
Randomize
