but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
Definitely locked eyes with the stripper who gave me a lapdance last night as she walked by me and into the Ann Taylor Loft in Times Square.
I just spent the last two hours on the phone with Emily trying to explain to her how to finger herself.
There was a pool of blood on my desk and we still don't know who it belongs to. missed a good party, man.
so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
Drunk on Tuesday. Double fisting. Mmmbop is playing. Only girl in the group. Life is complete.
I've decided I'm peeing in a solo cup then throwing it on his windshield. It's official. He called the cops 4 times in our first week at the house. He deserves it, right?
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
Ask me who hasn't showered since Sunday and just got cruised at the gas station on his way to work. I'm a terrible gay.
Went to put my shoe on and asked myself why I left a sock in it. I didn't. Needless to say I found our used condom.
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
Blow Jobs and the Patriots Playing I think I’m going to marry her
We havent had power for three days. What else is there to do besides drink and fuck? I thought that was obvious.
Randomize
