I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
I woke up this morning with I hate myself feeling
At least you didnt end up topless in a Tina Turner wig singing cabaret tunes
Aparently his snake got loose in the middle of the night. Not a sex joke, he has a fucking snake
...and the foreplay consisted of me threatening to cut off his hand if he didn't remove it from my back.
who said I'd never amount to anything...i just won 'most enthusiastic' at my poledancing class
It was pathetic and I was covered in butter
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
you should be awarded for your promiscuity.
i really should.
I look like slutty woodland creatures dress me in the morning. Everybody's got problems.
White people are beatboxing! Save me.
It felt as if we were fucking on a sea of baby feet and morgan freemans face hair
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
MEG JUST LICKED A DRAIN PIPE. DAVE PUNCHED MATT IN THE THROAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN. I REPEAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN.
i put frozen meatballs in my drink thinking they were ice cubes and I'm vegetarian wtf
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