So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
On second thought, trying to signify she was a butter face by wiping my bagel on her cheek may not have been in my best of interests
We invented "Diesel Bombs." They're supposed to be a bomb, but they come in a 20+ oz. glass and have a blackout record of 6 wins and 0 losses. Undoubtedly going to be the next Muhammed Ali of the drinking world.
My walk of shame this morning would have been much less obvious if it hadn't been 6:30 in the morning and I wasn't walking through downtown Nashville in a Steeler jersey.
I have a taco in my pocket for later because I am a practical drunk
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
I had to hypnotize my roommate last night so there's that.
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
I told you naked hot tub wrestling would turn bad now one of us has a gash on the head and another a black eye
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
WAIT this kid is eating yogurt with a fucking ladle. what is happening?
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
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