i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
I'm dying. Please wear something slutty to my funeral.
You brought back some girl with you at 3am and introduced her to everyone as "hot pocket"
Not sure why I sent you a picture of a black bear last night but it seemed like a good idea at the time.
Nope. Daytime is texting time. Night time is you send me naked pictures time.
Of course I'm not above using aladdin and pot to get laid, this is america
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
Being with her was like shitty sexual fear factor big ass sausage nipples over sized outty belly button i was scared and drunk tell know one
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
Blow jobs in the hobby lobby parking lot, oh lawd there gonna pray for me when they review those tapes ...
you can tell a lot about a person by the quality of their porn
I got caught throwing up in my daughters princess potty... On the bright side it played a rewarding tune afterwards.
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
dude. I can hear the air.
He said "I can't believe I had sex with a cat lady". Am I flattered or is this a new low?
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