It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
i wish peter jackson would direct porn
you announced to everyone at the bar "fuck girls. they're confusing. im gonna start having sex with boys now"
this stripper weighs a pound. I feel like I should tip her in food.
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
The liquor store wont accept checks from us anymore.
Call me when you get up. This hang-over is like dismantling a bomb: I need someone to talk me through it.
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
If you wanna be a real wingman, create some insecurity and comment on that pic of all the hot girls with "Id do every girl in this pic.. except the fat one".
Man I'll cab it I'll be sloshed by then. There's turtles involved
You said something about how beautiful my pockets were, then walked away.
Yes talking about pockets is classic me.
Congratulations, you have turned my vagina into a garden hose.
My vagina needs a break, I had to ice it with a beer bottle last night.
I wore Yonce braids out last night and made out with a man and a woman #bowdown is right
u better not lose ur virginity to a sugar daddy who doesn’t post a pic of himself to tinder
Randomize
