We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
The bartender let me pay my bar tab with my itunes giftcards.
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
I accidentally screamed the wrong name last night. He stopped for a second, said "fuck it, you're too hot to care," and then continued fucking me.
im taking a nap outside. wake me up in an hour.
way to go to work and not wake me up. when you get home youre rubbing me with aloe and giving me a blowjob. no excuses
We made a bong out of a plastic football. I can honestly say we make a good team.
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
I might come over. Something about you makes me matronly and I have this urge to nurse you back to health with soup and a blowjob
Whatever, I used my iphone to send an Escalade to pick up a booty call last week. For free. It is futuristic as fuck out here.
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
At 12:16 am. We just got out of the truck and went behind it and fucked. With 3 people in the truck. On the side of the road. As cars drove by.
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
How drunk is too drunk to be on an airplane?
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