i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
My boogers are black from last night. So that's either from all the colored hairspray or inhaling all of the tragedy from the party...
Balcony sex scratched the shit out of my phone. Whups.
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
Great News, you CAN smoke bowls with a magnifying glass
Get over here. It's an emergency. Just realized I haven't hd my mouth on a penis in two weeks. Get over here.
It was ths the worst 15 minutes of my life. . . It was like fucking a warm stick of butter.
Until this weekend, a man hadn't made me orgasm since the night Obama was elected. Now THAT is change I can believe in.
The date went significantly better after the fifth shot of fireball.
I'm too over dressed and drunk for this emergency vets office
he called me 'mate' and i had to remind him that you dont call people mate who continously make your dick hard
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
Sorry. We had to leave because I knocked a guy out for saying "yolo".
I thought the dude was just really enjoying his piss but apparently he was jerkin off into the urinal.
Randomize
