grandma shit on top of the toilet
It's more exciting when they aren't single....and even better when you have to pretend that you just slept with their roommate while trying to do the walk a shame as their girlfriend comes marching into the apt.
Im not the least bit jealous of the life you lead.
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
MY DOG FOUND A BAG OF COKE ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!!!!!!!!!!!
AND ITS GOOD STUFF TOO!!!!!! AHHH!!!!!!
Isn't it statistically impossible for THAT many ugly people to be in one place at one time?
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
I AM SUCH A BETTER PERSON ON DRUGS
...But it's not like we would be the first people to pay for an abortion with student loans and cell phone rebates.
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
Just made a list of all the guys I've hooked up with. "Roofie tattoo eyelids", "xanex night guy", "rainy concert", "cory blanket" and "naked hottub guy" made it.
posting about faith hill is really not helping you get me into your bed
Honesty, no. I just want to shower you with hot dogs.
she and her cat are both sick as fuck so they just sat there looking at each other with her nose dripping on the cat's. both out of fucks
I just came so hard my vision went blurry. I can only hope one day I'll find a man that can accomplish what my left hand does on a tri-daily basis.
i had every intention of working out now im just drinking wine and thinking about taking nudes in my thigh high tube socks
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