why did i wake up with a kid named Raphael in my bed this morning?
I dont know but you did call last night to tell me you found the last ninja turtle
It was weird to see you drinking wine out a glass instead of a red cup today
You're so easy to please, it's adorable. Like an alcoholic puppy.
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
So he didn't pull out. And I like flipped out. And the he told me to chill and opened up a drawer full of packs of Plan B and handed me one.......
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
There are only families here. I'm at the bar alone double fisting drinks. You cannot get any more approachable than I am now.
You're welcome to join, but just to warn you, tequila makes my clothes disappear. And I'm telling you that as an adult to an adult, not as your supervising teacher who decides whether or not you graduate.
Okay let's look at your past accomplishments you've done hungover... Sat great score, academic decathlon, state for track. I think you are solid to go out tonight
who was i chillin with last night? i woke up in a storage unit
Just made out with the guy who gave me my tour. Full circle college win.
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
I'm only coming over if you have cocaine or a snickers bar
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
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